The ugly Easter egg

Growing up, my family would cover the kitchen counter with newspapers, pull out every small, shallow bowl and cup we owned, fill them up with vinegar and drop in a small colored tablet. The tablet would fizz, the scent of vinegar would sting the air, and the liquid would transform into a fantastic vibrant color. There would be bold hot pink, turquoise, sapphire blue and emerald green. We would wip out thin, flimsy wire holders and drop eggs into these pools of color for Easter. We were not the only family who did this- I know. But I am sure we were the only the family to have the tradition of the ugly Easter egg. My father's creative side would spike during our Easter coloring activities. He would take an egg, dip it into one cup of color before tossing it into another, and then another. The result would be a grayish, molted-colored egg. They were not pretty but it was also not truly Easter until my father produced his unique eggs.

His idea for egg coloring grew roots and from these roots sprouted saplings of inspiration. I am sorry to say I don't color eggs anymore but my sister and her kids do and yes, they create the infamous ugly egg. I am the proud owner of this year's egg; my sister presented it to me tonight. I am going out on a limb here and I am saying this egg makes all the others just become mute and blurred into the background. Behold: the sloth egg.